The Saginaw TX Cheerleaders are AWESOME

Posted: April 10, 2010 by thinkgoat in Just Messed Up

By ThinkGoat

Saganaw, Texas  Cheerleading spirit ideas as taken from Oak Harbor, Washington’s website:

MONDAY: Report to the school that your mascot is missing.
TUESDAY: Report that the mascot was seen in front of the school – display a picture
WEDNESDAY: Report the mascot was picked up by police – display a picture
THURSDAY: Report the mascot in jail – show a picture
FRIDAY: PEP RALLY- Report that the mascot was picked up by aliens and was returned to the school by the MEN IN BLACK, aka the principal and another teacher in MIB suits and glasses. Have them walk out to Men in Black by Will Smith. Then get the cheerleaders to dress as aliens and do a short dance to the song.

Nowhere on any site I researched did “building team spirit” include pissing in the soda and distributing it. Pfft. I think the rest of the world is way behind the cheerleading squad in Saganaw, Texas. Those chicks are so cool, they just thought everyone else should drink in their awesomeness.

They pissed in cups with soda and gave it to others to drink, explaining the “bitter taste” was just sour candy they put in there. “Oh, <hiccup> Okay!”

Although this incident happened last winter at a basketball game, the cute little vapid tinklers just couldn’t keep their nasty little secret. Nope. Not only did they end up bragging about it, they posted a video on You Tube. Shhhh. We all know how secrets like that stay within the coolness circle. 😉

Don’t know how, don’t know who – but somebody spilled the beans on these Sophomore chicklets and the Fort Worth area district authorities were notified. Now, I’m certainly glad the “Code of Conduct”, the “Discipline Handbook”, “Accountability Guidelines”, and “Character and Sportsmanship” at this school are so well-defined that the punishment the girls received met the grossness of the act itself. But wait, these are cheerleaders. These are the most fantastic little sexy things in short little skirts that give the administrators a hard-on while they have to attend these games that are a complete waste of precious drinking time. One thing admins are not, that is stupid. They’re not going to do anything that will jeopardize the loss of watching these bouncy little things in action. Oh.Hell.No.

Two of the girls received “in-school” suspensions (in the Principal’s office?) and the others received “lesser penalties”. What? Let me guess. They were given extra scholastic duties like, while closely monitored, having to determine how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Tootsie Pop. “But Mr. Bailey, I wanted the one in your pocket. The paper stick always makes me gag.” But wait, the human sprinklers were also suspended from the squad for the remainder of the term. THANK GOD it is April and their “job” is not required during track and field season…and baseball season.

So readers, if your children are experiencing some form of incontinence and they are embarrassed by their condition but still feel compelled to lead the charge with their cheering expertise, move on down to Saganaw, Texas. They can squirt out their bodily fluids and distribute it among their teammates with no serious consequences. Just make sure they do it at the end of the season.

Source1 | Source2

  1. Frankly Speaking says:

    LMAO Thinkgoat, where in the world do you come up with this shit? Cleverly written article.


  2. Lamplighter says:

    Pretty typical treatment of the “privileged” class…i.e. the jocks and the girls willing to flaunt their wares. (And I don’t mean just on the sidelines.)

    Utterly disgusting.


  3. thinkgoat says:

    LOL Every once in a while I run across bizarre little stories. I’ve found, if I don’t write them up, the sarcasm swells up inside my head until I run the risk of exploding! I write for self-preservation!

    Lamp – I found the administration’s inactions as atrocious if not more than the actions of the stupid little twits. At the very least, they should have all been tested for disease. Who knows, maybe one or two would have tested positive for a STD or something thus saving them future embarrassment of boyfriends coming back to confront them about their junk exhibiting funky things.

    It’s just appalling nothing more was done.


  4. shelly says:

    On now thats just nasty! Blah!


  5. Lamplighter says:

    The entire blame lies at the feet of the Administration – they created this monster of an attitude, and they foster it.

    I saw something similar in the high school where my children went. The girls’ basketball coach doubled as the head football coach, and both teams won games. The result? The man got to do whatever he damn well pleased with the blessing and protection of the people (MEN, every blasted one of ’em!) in power. If you made the basketball team, it was because you a. cleaned the coach’s house and did his laundry or b. slept with him. Yes, I DO mean that. It took 15 years to get his worthless backside fired. FIFTEEN!!! And at the next election, the school board members who managed to make it happen (over the strenuous objections of the Administrators) were soundly defeated by a slate of the same coach’s supporters.


    Oh – FYI – my daughter had nothing whatsoever to do with the basketball team, and my son didn’t play football, either.


  6. Stephanie Hobrock says:

    Sick and disgusting! How can it not be illegal?


  7. thinkgoat says:

    Stephanie, I think there are several charges this could fall under. They just didn’t want to put these poor girls through anything as embarrassing as getting handcuffed…unless it was for pleasure’s sake. 😉

    But seriously, had it been anyone else, criminal charges would have been filed – as they should be.



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